Saturday, June 20, 2015

Woman, Independent

Daily Draw: Celtic Lenormand ~ Woman/Lady

When we leave our parents home we gain our fourth stage of independence. We've passed baby, youth, teen, now we grapple with adult. No children for me so didn't do motherhood/empty nest independence, now we are in the retirement stage of independence. Our situations and actions at young adult and retired are probably where our widest chance for divergence from our peers lie.

I'm reminded by this card I'm lucky, our retirement could have been a disaster waiting to happen.  Rob worked away from home most of our marriage, my independence was full fledged because I made all the decisions, took care of all the business. Luckily the transition has been fairly seamless.
He has happily taken over the cooking, he cooks I clean up, I'm the winner!
We both have adventures alone, don't have to be joined at the hip. Both winners!
He does want to 'do' everything for me, which drove me up the wall, I had quiet words with him, he understood, win win.  A lot of words to say this newest stage of independence is a fine place to be. Like all the stages our independence is really mostly what we make it.

"There is a limit to the legitimate interference of collective opinion with individual independence:
and to find that limit, and maintain it against encroachment, is indispensable." ~ John Stuart Mill 1806-1873

5 comments:

  1. It is nice to have a marriage where there is compromise, shared responsibilities, and where you each can freely "do your own thing." A true treasure!

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  2. I am so happy to hear you are both adjusting so well to this new stag in your life! :D

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  3. Oh boy Sharyn, I was glad to hear you say this. My husband wants to do everything for me too since he retired. I thought at first it was because I have this pain problem but it appears he just wants a job.

    Odd is this land of retirement.

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    1. Glad to hear that Judith. I was feeling like it was related to having cancer and I in no way wish to be identified as ill. I think it really is the need for a job combined with we all love to be needed. Happy retirement to you both.
      I've wondered if your pain is related to fibromyalgia, some doctors don't believe it exists, a recent new name is nerve ending neuropathy, a better explanation I think. I found a miracle in 2005 and it turned my life around, I'm grateful every day. (((Judith)))

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  4. Thanks Sharyn. It,s something akin to fibromyalgia, maybe myofascial pin or straight myalgia, but I don't seem to fit the total definition and have trigger points. I just call it chronic muscle tension and nerve pain. I am tempted to call it My Brain Went Nuts One Day and Wouldn't Shut Off because that's seems to be closer to defining it.

    Gosh, you were so lucky that cancer didn't get you, it really is a miracle.

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I welcome your thoughts. Good bad or indifferent; opinions are the lifeblood of conversation and I always learn something from a new point of view. Thank you for visiting, Sharyn