Stitch It Back Together

Llewellyn Tarot ~ 3 of Coins

My favorite card of all the cards in all the decks I've owned over the years.
Fabric I can cut into little pieces and stitch back together with needle and thread. Generally making it up as I go, 3 of Coins projects, me, both boss and grunt labor.

Hey. A microcosm of every human's life. We may think we've planned, but each day offers options and decisions, mostly little ones but each rippling to the next day and year.

Am I doing what I expected and planned a year ago, five years ago? Yes, and actually no. Things change and so do I. My life is no static image. To ignore that and loaf along oblivious to the changes in it and me would be folly. 

Planned For Or Not

Dreamkeepers Tarot ~ 6 of Swords

At 5:AM I pulled this card and with my fuzzy vision saw it as 9 of Swords. Then I was sure it was 10 of Swords and wondered how I could connect both with my day. Spent some time looking at the charming chaos, nothing is as it seems, of Jen Kingwell quilts, thought some more, picked up the card again, and realized it was 6 of Swords. But an exceedingly odd one. A mental journey perhaps, rather than physical. A journey of illusion.

Which is a perfect card for me, as I've been on a mental journey of my own, having been flipped into it by an offhand comment by my niece. I've gone through meltdown grief, black rage, teeth-grinding bitch stage, ruthless I don't give a crap stage, recognition of the kernel that blew me sideways, and then worked across my perspective from there. It has been this kind of journey, all mental, involving no one else, but a serious movement in perspective. A life changer. 6 of Swords. What can I say, it happens, expected and planned for or totally not. 

Cast It From Me

Urban Tarot ~ 9 of Cups

That is a lot of cups, possibly full of cola or root beer. 140 calories per 12 ounce can, I think these drinks cups are 16 ounce. Can't remember the last time I had a soda, maybe a mini can of H.E.B. Red last summer in Texas? I'm a 3 cups of tea a day girl, 2 lumps, 40 calories a cup.

It only comes to mind because one of our presidential hopefuls, with all the things in the world to worry about, doesn't want publicly funded food stamps to pay for sugary drinks. Didn't know they did, but really? We can afford a Wall, but not a soda for a thirsty man?

I'm reminded by this card to focus on the bigger picture, the little stuff sorts itself out. I don't want to own a little pinched mind, for today I'm casting the small crap from me. I feel better already...

Savor

World Spirit Tarot ~ 9 of Coins

Abundance allows freedoms. So does color. So does poverty if you think about it. One has nothing to lose, the other can't be touched. How bad, for how long, does it take for someone rich to end up charged and at trial?

Elitists aside, it doesn't take much to have abundance, it encompasses an attitude of acknowledgement. What we haven't got is far less important to what we do have. Today, instead of looking to the Next thing, I'll savor what I have. Tomorrow we may all have nothing at all. 

Never A Dull Moment

Minchiate Etruria ~ Ace of Swords

Cut it off at the root
Off with it's head
Nip it in the bud
Cleave clean
Be the sharp edge
Never a dull moment...

New Lessons Please

Rosetta Tarot ~ 10 of Swords

Knowing the true cause doesn't alter the result. Broke is broken, gone is gone. Don't give a crap is in full force.

It can alter the future outlook though, if we accept it. Give us clarity, more black and white, less grayscale. Less chance of putting ourselves in the same path. I'd honestly prefer some new lessons, not the old one again. 

In The Tip

Spirit Keepers Tarot ~ 5 of Cups

"loss after the waning of joy, a personal feeling of disfigurement" Benebell Wen

Yep. That's where I am. In a rotten place. Under a scab. In the tip, not even worth recycling. No joy. Yes, I'm making fun, bullying if you will. Doesn't alter the fact, this is where I am.

But via the cards, I finally worked out yesterday what the trigger was, and working back from that revelation, not at all what I was hitting with the proverbial baseball bat.

How little we know ourselves, how much we obscure the truth. Life. Photoshopping truth is pointless.

Tougher Than They Appear

Ancient Feminine Wisdom Oracle ~ Hesperides

Nymphs in classical mythology who guard with the aid of a dragon a garden in which golden apples grow. Probably tougher than they appear.

What am I actually garding that has brought me so much pain this week? Does it matter? Probably not. Will I get over it? Always do. Just one more thing in the space behind the fence that is me. The hard protected place. 

We Can Be The Change

Ancient Feminine Wisdom Oracle ~ Hera

The Queen of the queens, the Goddess of the goddesses, the setter of standards, the leader of decent morals and conduct. And she went berserk, reversing social mores with her power. Because she could.

Nothing has changed. But this is one area where the individual can make a difference in our own lives and those we meet, stranger and friend. To be stronger than our basic instincts to strike back, knock down, to not take our ball and go home but give it to the group. We don't have to or get to fall to society's current base nastiness. We can rise above it, shine, be the beacons reflecting honesty and thoughtfulness, kindness. It goes a long way, costs nothing, ripples in ways we'll never know but will stand us in good stead in dark days of anything goes.  

Your Mileage May Vary

Ancient Feminine Wisdom Oracle ~ Artemis

Protective of innocents and innocence. A good mission albeit a bit hopeless. Via curiosity, accident, or intent, innocence slips away fairly early.

It doesn't have to disappear though; I'm protective of my own. There is much to worldliness I will not explore because I know from experience, once something goes in the brain it can never be exorcised and often inference is too much. Even without specifics my vision of the world is so dark, no way do I need it to be moreso. That's me, and Artemis, your mileage and needs may vary. It is the way of the world after all. 

Hybrid Mutts

Ancient Feminine Wisdom Oracle ~ Gaia

Primal. What could be more basic in the rule of nature than chicks? In a big brooder the same age as me, gift from my father in law.
My Precioussss....Easter Eggers. Hybrid mutts. Lovely.

Breaking The Mold

Ancient Feminine Wisdom ~ Medea

Was she an ancient feminine heroine, refusing to be silent and worshipful to the men around her, casting off convention? Was she evil incarnate, dooming family in a bid for love; or blind rage over rejection?

Her origin dates back to 14th century BC I think, but her lasting fame comes from the 431 BC play by Euripides in which she and Jason of the argonauts steal her father's golden fleece. Just a story, damning her in history. Were she real, in retrospect, would she have preferred to remain an acolyte of Hecate?

Sometimes a girl just has to break the mold, for good or bad. Add a tall dark sailor in a skimpy uniform on a hero's journey and...well the heart wants what the heart wants. I get it.

Me Me Me

Ancient Feminine Wisdom Oracle ~ Eris

Oh, she did love to poke the nest, stir the pot, press hot buttons, leak to the press, lie through her teeth, crush reputations, strew strife and discord, hate and envy and hurt, a mad dog to be put down.

A few years ago I would have said this kind of person was aberrant, mutant, clearly mentally deficient. I've been proved wrong, which just strengthens my theory that humankind has long outlived any value and hope we might have once had.

They Said It Wouldn't Last

Ancient Feminine Wisdom Oracle ~ Persephone

 Eleusinian Mysteries, a marriage based on kidnapping. Chthonic snowbirds, spring wheat, and general upheaval of local populations. Thousands of years after mythic worship has faded, the locals persevere. And spring wheat. And Hades and Persephone's marriage.

Rob and I will be celebrating 50 years on the 27th. We are still honeymooning. He still looks 25 to me, sexy, capable, funny and fun, caring, generous, smart, thoughtful, exciting. They said it wouldn't last. Ha.

Wallowing In It

Animism Tarot ~ 7 of Wands

Doubts and fears, followed by resolve. No hedgehogs here, so what I know is by reading. But doubts and fears, yeah baby, plenty of those.

Is there someone under the bed? SomeThing? Probably not.
Is this president the one that will nuke the world? Probably.
Will Gertie send the fabric? I think so, I do surely hope so.
Will the stuff on Craigslist sell? Hope so.
Is the Lowe's vet email legit? Not a clue, will ask at a store.
Will it stay dry enough, long enough to get the lawn mowed?
Is that pain, healing process or a new cancer? Yes and no...
Will any of my worries and doubts matter in 100 years?
Just number two. But it's easy to feel assailed if we allow it.
Particularly if we wallow in it.  

Beauty And Parades

Animism Tarot ~ 7 of Coins

A peacock? Really? Can anyone born beautiful really understand how the rest of us struggle? Perfection of face and figure opens doors, and much of what follows is based on that first impression. Ever see an unattractive person at the head of a parade?

Peacocks are brought in to wander the estate grounds, a gamekeeper to shoot all the crows. Bats are shunned as creepy. Which of the three are hard working? Earn their keep? Keep ecology ticking along? A peacock...Really?

Frolic Perspective

Animism Tarot ~ 2 of Wands

Ah, the high view, the long view. When beetling around, nose to a project or problem or pet priority, it is always a surprise to step back and wham, the perspective is changed, opening up the ability to see the errors, the flaws, the cracks in my thinking.

And occasionally it is coming along pretty darn well. This week's quilt project...450-ish pieces of fabric, 6 blocks assembled, up to about 28"X41" at this point. Sewn, inspected, again and again, pressed, sewn, inspected....stood back and there in the middle, a pink and black 2" block, upside down. Arrugh. Right in front of my nose, but I couldn't see it until then. Nuisance-y but a fairly easy fix at this stage. 2 of Wands, life's little ego leveler.

My version of the current Bonnie Hunter Mystery "Frolic"   What a difference a change in colors makes! Plus my own oddball changes. Doesn't look like the same quilt...but it is.

Drama Queen Chariot

Animism Tarot ~ Chariot

We have a friend who has a black horse. Very rare. Big offers from all over the world. Lives in a kind of tumbledown barn. But he gets love every day, companionship of other horses, and cares squat about human dollar value.

A neighbor has a shetland, dumped on BLM land, running with the big horses. They say they rescued him, but I see a lonely animal just existing, with little attention at all.

About ten years ago I braved up and patted a horse's soft nose. Most of my horse experience comes from reading westerns as a kid, and a few Wayne and Eastwood movies.

I'd love to have two or three mules, an animal that knows it's worth. Chariot and companion and no drama queen stuff...

Crocogator

Animism Tarot ~ 6 of Coins

Cheung describes this as the plover cleaning an alligator's teeth. A crocodile yes, but I find no references to this relationship between plover and alligator. Just getting that out of the way...

But the card does symbolize cause and effect, and ripples that spread. Thinking on this I just offered a large bin of the required fabrics to the closest Days For Girls chapter. I have an acquaintance that makes charming medical masks for children with congenital heart defects for Massachusetts hospitals. The local guild makes hundreds of quilts for battered women's shelters and the homeless. All quilters doing what they love to do, working with needle and fabric, spreading the love. In a world that needs it. Plover and crocogator...

Act And React

Animism Tarot ~ 7 of Swords

Thief or hoarder? Driven by curiosity? Or deceitfulness? Or need?
How can we judge the mind and actions of someone else when our own mind is clouded, our own actions suspect?

Today I will think about reactions...my own. What drives them, because someone else's actions are none of my business. 

Moonwalk

Animism Tarot ~ 4 of Cups

Sloths move about 41 yards a day. Low metabolism via a simple twig/bud/leaf diet. Works for them, where do that have to go?

Wet and cold  here, some days I never leave the house. But my lawn is greening up and could already use its first mowing of the year. I feel the yearning to leave my tree, get busy, get going, blow the cobwebs out of my headspace. To all intents and purposes I'm healed from my surgery. Time to leave off sloth life and get out in real space.

And the moon is stunning this morning, I've already been out at 4:15 for a sweeping forward fold salutation and a quick moonwalk. Can a brisk day walk be far behind?

Symbiotic

White Hare Wisdom ~ Hidden

White Hare speaks of the magic that happens which I wonder if the famous declutter books mention. Correct me if I'm wrong please, I haven't read any of them, only spent nineteen years working and living a decluttered life.

A sincere clear out unclutters the mind. It continues to clarify with progress. A life altering symbiotic relationship between mental stuff and physical stuff. Amazing. Lovely. I promise.

Not Offered On Any Website

White Hare Wisdom ~ Retreat

Yesterday was non-retreat. We went to the Sportsman Show with many thousands of people. Fun, and interesting, most attendees don't know they could go to New Zealand for half the cost of going to Alaska.

There were at least ten Safari booths which surprised me, In all my life of associating with sportsmen I've only known two that went. Both blowhards if truth be told. If it matters.

After our tour I grabbed a bench and my book (Dragons!) and Rob went back to the booths he'd marked for explorations. He found an opportunity for a fly fishing retreat that isn't offered on any website, Just by taking the time to have a real conversation. Would that we could do that with everyone we meet. Well done Rob. 

Think With Wonder

White Hare Wisdom ~ Magic

Does a tree make a sound when it falls in the forest and no one hears it go? Of course it does...or does it? Is it magic if no one recognizes it as such? I wonder. Or is that the magic?

I don't believe I can make magic, wouldn't actively try, but look for and acknowledge it around me? Absodanglootley. And each day the world's magic presents itself.

Open Breathe Look Think

Curses, Foiled

White Hare Wisdom ~ Curiosity

Will it work? Might as well try, I'm dead in the water anyway. I've spent four days designing a quilt block for my current quilt. In the pattern it is just a 6.5" square of fabric, 36 required. But I have a stack of 3" house blocks made over the years, so cute as to be deemed illegal. So I'm using them for the centers and building around it. Except these blocks are set on point which changes everything measurement wise. No math whiz I, two of those days were spent making different paper templates and sewing them together to bring the block up to size. Pitiful.

Sizes now known, time to choose the fabric. Auditioning dozens when I saw The One, I knew it was perfect!! Eureka! And I'm 6" short. Curses, Foiled. So I scanned it and asked on FB if anyone had any left (it's probably 10-15 years old) and two days later...Found! If I wasn't curious if the idea of asking had merit, I'd still be in the quilt room, cross, looking at my sample blocks, Really Cross. Now wiggling like a  new puppy at 4:30 AM. 

Embrace Your Ears et. al.

White Hare Wisdom ~ Self Belief

Do I believe in myself enough to poke holes in my hat and expose my ears?

The more I mature the more I try to be flexible. Not just in what I share, but in accepting what others share with me. We are just people, trying to survive life. It isn't often easy.

The kernel of truth I've discovered is like a bad hair day, no one cares but me. Embrace it and get on with it. 

Opening That Shuttered Mind

White Hare Wisdom ~ Star Gazing

Ah, more perspective advice, to take in the big picture today.
I vowed frequently in the past year I wasn't voting for anyone 70 or older. That may be my only option...

I said no one 70 or older because being president is a hard job that aged our past leaders fast. Our sitting president works 3 hour days and spent a full 1/3 of each year of his presidency on vacation. Why was I worried? Easy Peasy job. Any of my grandparents could handle that.

I think I'll run, a good time-filler in retirement. Why was my vision so shuttered? Just a matter of opening to a  new perspective. What will my closed mind be open to next?

The Light Begins To Return

White Hare Wisdom ~ Imbolc

The periods of light lengthen, nature begins to stir. The robins are back, working the yard for grubs and worms.

 We've had a long look at the seven lilacs, now each little groves. Thirty years and they are a mess, it will take some serious culling to bring them back to their proper glory.

Our grove of cedars, two more need to be removed, soon there will be none. They should all go, but I love them so.

The daffodil plot has two inch ears sticking up, it always seems way too early, and they always get covered with snow this time of year, but of course nature knows, and there will be some blooms for Ostara.  The light returns...in spite of humans. 

Flounced From The Room

Rosetta Tarot ~ Emperor

"Mind over matter, logic over nature" Meleen

I drew this card an hour and a half ago, just turned it on it's face and mentally flounced from the room. I often have these qualities, often nurture them even, why does the very idea of this card make my skin crawl?