Monday, August 31, 2020

Creating Refractions

 Telluric Tarot ~ Fool

"Embrace the uncommon" Lunaria Gold. Labradorite is formed from minute layers yet compresses to Mohs 6 hardness, Rubus Arcticus flowers and produces fruit in the Arctic. Just off the top of my head I'd say neither was possible. But of course they are. Like us, made of layers, infant fools unable to reason beyond hunger and sleep, into adults, hardened. Hopefully with some sweet left to balance the bitter. 

These are bitter times, for those of us paying attention. I spend my early morning both astonished and astounded. Maybe they are the same, layers being compressed into my psyche. Certainly historical, but I'd rather read about it in the compressed pages of a book in twenty years than be living it. Or maybe not. Perhaps one of those layers is pure excited. Watching the train wreck happen. I'm a rider, will I be thrown clear unscathed? Hardly, we are all scathed whether we admit it or not. If we incorporate it properly it will make the refractions...

Sunday, August 30, 2020

Piece Of Cake

 Telluric Tarot ~ 9 of Wands

Sinhalite, seldom found in crystal form, mostly just grains and pebbles. Bloodroot, whose sap is corrosive. Beat up and scarred; me after two weeks of convention speeches, me after two days under two fifty year old rhododendrons trimming and shaping. Do I know more? More likely like most Americans, I know more than I wanted of what I already knew. The Rhodies? Gorgeous, park like, if I were a little kid I'd be making a playhouse under one. But what a job, I hurt everywhere.

The 9 of Wands stuff that assails us every day, leaving us mentally heartsick or physically exhausted. But the beauty of human is how quickly we bounce back. I'm ready to tackle the lilacs, and eager for my ballot to arrive in the mail. Piece of cake, we can do this. 

Saturday, August 29, 2020

A Story Of Small Illuminations

 Spiritsong Tarot ~ 5 of Cups/Shells

Little Illuminator. A kinder view of what is often portrayed as a grim card. So I'll share a story of illumination. 

In early 2000's I wrote in a Gratitude Journal every day for three years. I'm guessing I saw the idea on Oprah. It changed my life, all for the better. I had No idea how negative I was until I started physically writing down what was positive. For the first weeks it was shelter, food, family, friends. Then I finally realized it was the blue of the sky, the sound of leaves rustling, running my hand across a cats silky back, laughing at the carrot soup with one carrot coin in it. All the little happys that add up to Joy. That cannot be taken away. 

On May 3, I thought it might be a good time to do it again, but times and my eyesight have changed. So I looked in the App store and found the Gratitude Happiness Journal by Shashi Kumar. I left a 4 Star review, indicating I loved using it but wished the font was larger, I was finding it difficult to see. He prompt responded saying he would put it in the queue of updates. Yeah, right...right? 

After using it 93 days, appreciating how the process of recognizing what we do have enriches my life, last week I just quit. That font...too small. On August 26 I got an email from Shashi asking me to update the app and tell him what I thought. I did and thought...hokey smokes I've got to put this in my gratitude app!! I can see :) Thank you Shashi, you illuminate my life. 

Friday, August 28, 2020

Prudent, I Think...

 Spiritsong Tarot ~ 4 of Coins/Crystals

Prudence, one of the four Cardinal Virtues. “Prudence is the virtue that uses practical reason to discern true good in every circumstance and choose the right means of achieving it; It is called the charioteer of the virtues; it guides the other virtues by setting rule and measure." (Sister Google)

I looked it up because this card seldom comes out of the fan, and it has turned up this month with the Kurmay, Cathar, and Roots of Asia decks. Not being a Woman of Wants I had to think hard about where my $$'s have gone this August. 

  • 13 shares of ETSY. Lost $$'s so far but ask next August 
  • 2 books for Rob, A River Never Sleeps and  I've Never Met An Idiot On The River 
  • 3 decks, Telluric, 5 Cent, Spiritsong.
  •  10 yards of Kaffe fabric remnants, to go with scraps on hand 40% off.
  • Electric, water, groceries, auto fuel. That's it. Maybe more than normal.  I'm ok I think. 

Thursday, August 27, 2020


 Spiritsong Tarot ~ Knight of Coins/Crystals

Endurance. I've been up since 4 AM. Nothing new there. I am dressed to the shoes, hair combed, no earrings yet, I think I'll be wearing the opals Rob brought me from Australia. Would we just love to tour Coober Pedy? Oh yes. Which brings my brain around to rocks. Do they endure? Indubitably. 

They make me smile every time I approach my home. Sometimes I water them. If you collect rocks you'll understand. Endure is a good word to have thinks on today. And I'll go water my rocks. One of them is a poser, a burgundy porcelain doorknob, undoubtedly antique, a friend found in a dirt bank on his farm. An oddball find, probably why I came to mind when he found it. It has a few chips, shows a lot of wear, as do I. 

Wednesday, August 26, 2020

Question Everything

 Spiritsong Tarot ~ Page of Swords/Feathers

Question everything. Take nothing for granted.

Once again I've written for an hour, and deleted it. Mental junk food, not worth the calories to consume. This Page needs a new mental path. 

Tuesday, August 25, 2020

Make The Light

 Spiritsong Tarot ~ 9 of Swords/Feathers

Self protecting. Porcupine is renowned for its protective quills, the vulnerable spot is its unprotected head which is where natural predators attack. We use our prickly personality to ward off what we consider attacks, but those incoming virtual quills we are fending off...they sure do hurt or make us mad. Or anxious. Or sleepless. Or crabby. Or morose. 

A small thing I did yesterday to fend off the mental dark, I plugged in my color light string on the deck. This morning when I came downstairs at 3 AM there they were, their simple beauty making me smile. 

Yesterday the colorful toggles I ordered for my tie-on masks came. From China. What an amazing world we live in. I made a four day reservation on the riverfront just south of me. I talked a quilt shop across the country into saving the bolt end scraps of Kaffe fabric for me. To not be engulfed in the dark we need to make the light. 

Monday, August 24, 2020

Sticky Paths

 Spiritsong Tarot ~ 9 of Coins/Crystals

Reasoning together with desire. I did not know until recently the reason spiders don't get caught in their own webs; they spin both sticky and non-sticky filaments. Obvious once you know it. It is how we get though life, we know what the sticky paths are, immoralities which lead to the classic cardinal sins, those spiritsong crushers. 

I've traveled some of the sticky paths, glanced off a few, lucky to get away with my life intact. Spiders also have claws on the end of their legs, to keep upright on the non-sticky path. That would be our brain, working on our behalf to have a well-lived life. 

I don't think it gets any easier with age. I still have the desire to do most of the sins. Particularly wrath. 

Sunday, August 23, 2020

Meek, Not

 Spirtsong Tarot ~ 5 of Swords/Feathers

Armadillo. Never seen one, but Sister Google indicates they feed at dusk and dawn, have weak peg teeth so mostly on grubs, worms, beetles. Otherwise their best sport is sleeping 18 hours a day. 

How does that relate to the 5 of Swords? Their species date back to dinosaur times, far longer than the current flavor of human. They mind their own business. Ignore the world. Let the eons pass unremarked. 

As humans we can chose that option, but it isn't advisable because that is how the heads of church and state and corporations like us. Meek, curled up in a ball, ignorant. Let's not. 5 of Swords is an option, not a sentence.

Saturday, August 22, 2020

Life Is Weird. So Is Muerte.

 Pathwalker's Patchwork Deck ~ Santa Muerte Tarot ~ Queen of Cups

Emotionally stable. As if. Rocks are stable. People aren't. This Queen of Hearts has found her stability in death. Cool. We find joy in love but also the greatest pain.

My little sister died in 2012. I still can't speak her name, or talk of her. Why she and not me? I could slip away unremarked, she was ripped away, leaving her family bereft, still needing her. I drove 1120 miles in one day, Rawlings Wyoming to Olympia Washington trying to make it on time, and I missed by ten minutes. I lay down beside her and held her until she cooled. Was I or she comforted? I still can't say. 

Life is weird. So is Muerte. 

Friday, August 21, 2020

Lucky All Round

 Pathwalker's Patchwork Deck ~ True Love Tarot ~ Wheel

Keyword: Luck. Believe in luck? Absolutely. How else would Rob have been in the street where I was driving too fast? Why else would he have ever come into the cafe where I worked and read me the riot act? Lucky lucky lucky. Mine all mine. 

At the shelter I had my hands out reaching for a black cat when a little striped butterscotch boy jumped up on the scratching post and shouted at me until he had my attention. Honcho is an up boy, up on the shower rail, up on the deck roof, up on the interior beams, and his favorite place of all, up on Rob's shoulders riding around his world. Lucky all around, he and I. To have him. 

Thursday, August 20, 2020

Whitewater Alert

 Pathwalker's Patchwork Deck ~ Kurmay Tarot ~ 4 of Coins

The worldly. Obligations and passions, health and wealth. Looking at where these discs are located, where accordingly has he placed these four concerns? Is he overmindful of his heart at the expense of his obligations? Is he mentally living in la-la land while his fiduciary responsibilities are kicked aside? Or does he maintain a firm foundation in the real world while allowing his heart and mind to enjoy life? I'd love to see a human form on a 4 of Coins looking something besides glum. 

Three suits, feelings (cups), thoughts (swords), actions, (wands) are fairly consistent through life because typically those patterns are set early. But the worldly part is more river, rough calm deep shallow, dry bed or over the banks, always changing and yet it is so easy to forget we are actually on that whitewater raft. Oblivious to the fact we need to be alert, be rowing, be ready. Humans. It is a wonder we get as far down that river as we do as distracted as we allow ourselves to be. 

Wednesday, August 19, 2020

Look Back And Laugh

 Pathwalker's Patchwork Deck ~ Vandenboere Bacchus ~ Fool

Without reasoning powers, or a capacity to acquire them is the legal definition of fool. This probably isn't one, his clothes are right side out, he can support a companion, he has packed a bag against future need, he has a staff for rough terrain. Not everyone has a nesting gene or a craving for possessions. A working court jester perhaps, or a vagabond, a migrant laborer. My grandfather was one of those, that is how they rode out the 1930's depression, until they hit the fifth kid, then grandmother said no more shacks and moving with the crops. 

I've been a fool many times, yet eventually reasoning myself out of foolish physical, mental, financial, behavior. Will humans ever learn? is one of our strengths. Because it exercises  our reasoning muscle. And what fun is life if we don't have something to look back on and laugh? 

Tuesday, August 18, 2020

Still Full Tilt

 Pathwalker's Patchwork Deck ~ Enchanted Tarot ~ Knight of Coins

There is world building going on here, fey in armor, animals in bridles. War, tarted up as art. Dominate. The D word. Must we always? I get so tired of my cynical critical mindset, but where did I learn it? 

Being a knight was just a job for rich men's sons who couldn't be seen building fences or hod carrying. Get a lot of knights standing around, you have to find something for them to do. Hey! Let's have a war! Or a Crusade, war by another name, sneak up on them! Rabbit punch 'em, poke 'em with sharp sticks. 

Today they have yacht races, play professional sports, run for office, still war. Is it DNA or is it training? Whichever, it is still in full tilt. 

Monday, August 17, 2020

Color My World With It

 Pathwalker's Patchwork Deck ~ Mythic Tarot ~ 2 of Cups

Eros shot himself with his own arrow and promptly fell in love with the mortal Psyche. I remember those days, in and out of new love every week, each time of course being the One, the Real, the Lasting. The one sided. Part of growing up with instinct to mate driving the bus. 

That electricity, that chemistry occurs in all parts of our life though, excited for the big game, the new art materials; how many times do we say 'oh I love...' those shoes, your dog, that tree. If we don't have it we manufacture it for someone or something. It's our nature.

I love love. It truly makes the personal world go around. I embrace it, color my world with it, look for ways to add it. Incurable romantic? No, just loving life. 

Sunday, August 16, 2020

Drank The Kool-Aid

 Pathwalker's Patchwork Deck ~ Sephiroth Tarot ~ Tower

Quite a stylized Tower, our own construct perhaps. Built on too many nebulous expectations, not enough hard rock foundation. 

There is also the perspective problem. I've seen and taken photos like this, an upward angle to give importance to the item in question, but mostly to block out all the surround we don't want to see or think about. Straight on, probably not so overwhelming or spectacular at all. 

My Tower was built on assumption, I drank the kool-aid. Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me. Won't happen twice.

Saturday, August 15, 2020

Cleaned Bones

 Roots of Asia Tarot ~ 4 of Coins

Knowing the treasures within. In these odd times I'm often gripped with overwhelming sorrow. I find myself in the yard or at a window or here, clenched in rage.

I feel like road kill on a busy highway where it will take forever for my bones to get picked clean.

So what are the treasures within? What sustains us? If we were stripped of all we have, and left with all we know... what and where would we be? In 2017 I wrote of this card "in life things flow out and flow in, if we have a death grip on our 4 Coins that doesn't give margin for diversification". A think to ponder today, and what treasures lie within. 

Friday, August 14, 2020

Adapt And Rejuvenate

 Roots of Asia Tarot ~ 3 of Swords

Pierced with cravings. Probably the best 3 of Swords concept I've heard in a long time. I crave hooking up the 5th Wheel trailer and zooming off for distant parts. I simply won't do it, but I could, I know lots of people are. Until I drew this card I was thinking of it as grieving for what was the norm, but it is just a craving. 

I'm human, I've lived with and dealt with cravings all my life. Covid just made more of them, that is all. We can do this, our heart is pierced, but not our brain. Alter, adapt, compromise, digging in our heels and saying things have to be the old way or no way is the death. The old way is gone. 

There is a stunning place to camp not 20 miles south of me, and another about 40 miles west. If we camped in those places 1000 miles from home we'd think we'd found a jewel of a place to visit. Just because it is next door doesn't mean it won't be interesting and rejuvenating. It is just a craving after all, not life and death. 

Thursday, August 13, 2020

Shift Sideways

 Roots of Asia Tarot ~ 8 of Swords

Causes of pain or ruin, places of spiritual or moral darkness. Difficult to break out of because often repairs and fixes are outside our control. But sometimes, if we can just shift sideways...I know the author and artist for this deck are both from Thailand, but I did not know if Thailand has owls. A search makes me think this one might be a spot-bellied eagle-owl or a buffy fish owl, and for the moments of finding that information I was outside my current 8 of Swords place. 

I can't help but figuratively put my hands over my eyes, expend energy that could be better spent furious at people who don't know or care I exist, be appalled at what suddenly seems acceptable behavior, the incivility that pours down from the top. But the owls in Thailand don't know or care, they've survived worse and lived to tell the tale, we will too. Eventually. Maybe. Some of us.  

Wednesday, August 12, 2020

The Earth Is Flat

 Roots of Asia Tarot ~ Sun

It's all good. 

Can we believe this? Not 24/7 but we can work at it. The world badly needed a wake up call and we got it. Not that everyone has their eyes open yet, there are people who say they believe Earth is flat. 

I won't be sorry when it is time to leave it. 

Tuesday, August 11, 2020

Lazy Hinny

 Roots of Asia Tarot ~ 2 of Swords

Right thinking, higher intellect. My lazy hinny side likes to be the boss. I have a carton of fresh eggs for my neighbor, the first for them from the new hens. For two days I've opened the fridge, thought I should walk them down, haven't. 

I'll do that next. Life is after all, the right thing in the small as well as the big. A little exercise, friendliness, generosity and Richard will be so excited to have fresh eggs. Getting my lazy (Y) moving here. 

Monday, August 10, 2020

See How They Like It

 Roots of Asia Tarot ~ Empress

Unconditional kindness and goodness. The peace needs to be in our heart to be fulfilled in our life. Yesterday my heart and mind said I'd like to find every ivory and fin poacher that ever lived and cut their noses off with a chainsaw. See how they liked it. 

Pretty sure where that places me in the queue for peace. Some days I'm not even a work in progress. 

Sunday, August 9, 2020

10,000 Hours

Roots of Asia Tarot ~ Knight of Coins

Full of potential, not enough experience. Conventional wisdom says it takes 10,000 hours to become an expert at a skill, providing the potential is there to begin with.  For the non-natural this is usually the way to get to the top. Study. Plus those 10K hours. 

This calf doesn't need a book, elephants have ancient knowledge handed down through DNA, they just need time to grow into it. 

I have spent the morning trying to figure out how to get Rob's rebuilt computer to recognize our home wifi, check, recognizes, won't work. How many thousand hours have I used a computer since 1996? Too many, apparently it still isn't enough. Reading the news, writing a blog, isn't study, doesn't equal skill. Oops. Still a Page. 

Saturday, August 8, 2020

Small Quivers

 Roots of Asia Tarot ~ 2 of Wands

Foundation quivers. Well laid plans fall apart. Good friends move. Favorite store closes. Route detours. Flat tires, motherboard fried, left homework at school. Bad hair day, hard words with a loved one. Stinkin' New Unimproved Blogger. The sort of things that make up daily life, small teeth grinders. 

Dealing with them is the thing isn't it? What kind of a mood were we in to begin with? How many in the pile all at once? I could go either way today. I had two emails yesterday afternoon, one which made my day, made me want to hug everyone in sight. The other knocked me for a loop and left me awake all night. Will the one ultimately balance the other? 

Friday, August 7, 2020

Latent Tendencies

Roots of Asia Tarot ~ 7 of Swords

Latent tendencies. Gosh, let me count the ways. The ability and seeming desire to self-sabotage. We know we shouldn't we do it anyway. We don't mean to it happens. 

Beings I must be about 8 years old, I made myself a cup of coffee this morning. Verboten. Pulled my card, wrote the first paragraph...I've now started fresh, coffee down the drain, hot cardamon not-tea in hand. 

Each new day gives us the opportunity to begin afresh. Be gone ye latent tendencies, I'm stronger than you, better than that. 

Thursday, August 6, 2020

Better Than What?

Cathar Tarot ~ 5 of Coins/Wisdom

Often this card is seen as circumstances outside our control. But it is also a card of individual effort, struggle to make a better life. Part of that struggle is realizing we need to define better than what? It is really odd how aimless much of our life is. 

I was well into my 20's before I set one concrete life goal. My 40's before I realized goals move. But once I did that my life took on traction that reverberates still today. Since then I've set and achieved many betters...and crashed and burned plenty of times, also progress of a sort. And I'd far rather that than a pampered bubble, that is the saddest life of all. 

Wednesday, August 5, 2020

Half Of Everyone You Know

Cathar Tarot ~ 8 of Swords

The feeling of overwhelming odds, futility, isolation. Seems we have a lot in common with the Cathars of the fourteenth century. A few gone, then many, then all. The fourteenth century also includes the plague called the Black Death. Nearly 50% of the European population died in a four year period. 

If Covid-19 comes to that what will your and my world look like? There isn't anything to say it won't. It mutates rapidly and inoculations are by their nature and strain design specific. 8 of Swords requires facing the facts, marshaling our strengths. 

Today's think, imagine the world with half of everyone in it gone. Because human nature has to see it to believe it. Maybe then we will. 

Tuesday, August 4, 2020

Stand With The Ghosts

Cathar Tarot ~ 10 of Wands/Shields

The Cathars were no strangers to lies, plots, betrayals, cunning plans and senseless murders. Their Faith was simple, as was their lifestyle and in the end they were all gone. 

Persecution. It isn't stealing lunch money. It is unreasoning unrelenting uncalled for punishment for race or religion or politics. 

Look out the current window to the world and it is everywhere. All I feel is shame and sorrow for this space called America. I stand with the ghosts of the Cathars. How can people carry and spew so much hate and their brains just not explode? 10 of Wands indeed.

Monday, August 3, 2020

Status Quo

Cathar Tarot ~ 4 of Coins/Wisdom

Tattered, fleeing, he takes his best goods with him. Critical utensils, books...reliquary? Decimated by the arrogant Templar Crusades, subjected to the Spanish Inquisition, finally sanctioned genocide. For thinking differently, peaceably. 

Nothing changes. But I'm wondering about that box. Is it just a box? The Cathars would most certainly not revered a fancy box with a dubious knuckle bone inside. But even the poorest among us have something special. Or perhaps in reversed 4 of Coins fashion, in his 4 of Wisdom form he is taking his special items to gift somewhere sensing the writing on the wall that the Cather's are doomed. 

And here I am with three big bins of good goods behind my couch. I don't want the stuff, but my petty heart says it's too good to donate? What the heck is the matter with my brain and heart? 

Sunday, August 2, 2020

Tree Rings on Lammas


When we replenish the flight branches of our brooms by gleaning under the forest giants. 

I counted the rings on the maple we are currently harvesting. Sixty. A seedling in 1960. Last century. I give thanks for the heat it will provide. I give thanks for the clean air it provided. I give thanks for the shade and homes it provided for woodland creatures, birds, and insects. Thank you. 

Life is a circle and we each do our part, and then return to the earth. Lovely life. Lammas. 

Followers Do Not Equal Quality

Cathar Tarot ~ Magician/Parfait

Those we come into contact with which lead us further on our journey. Some lead by example, we may never interact with them but they have lasting influences. Some are paid to teach us, some we meet in the course of our allotted days. 

In pursuit of the Watkins link for my sidebar today I ran across a deck I'd never heard of, which led to the information it was a product by a 'social influencer'. My spell check won't even acknowledge that word. She won't be one of my Perfecti in this lifetime. 

Children are stuck with classroom teachers but as adults we can choose what vessels we drink from. I won't be shouted at, bullied, told the cracked dirty glass is the only one on offer, I have to do or think because this is the way it's always been done. If what you offer doesn't make me smarter, make my life brighter, enrich the community... screw you and the horse you rode in on. Followers don't equal quality. 

Saturday, August 1, 2020


Etruscan Tarot ~ 10 of Coins

Ah. Perfect card to end the week, and I feel more at peace with myself than I have in months. I am what I am, the world is what it is, I will do what I can and must.  I wish that for everyone.